The Little Black Dog
Article Summary
If someone was to ask me to tell a story about what the bottom line of my book The Truth Bubbles Up stands for I would tell them - this is it! This story is sad but a true meaning of life comes out in this story. It is also a story that you will not soon forget. That is the power of storytelling.
Here are a few meanings involved in this story:
Hurt people, hurt people. We are all hurt, people.
We are not victims of our circumstances. Responsibility for your attitude is everything. Living from victor is even more.
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As a kid, I used to walk 2 miles to school. I lived one block off of Braeswood which is a busy street that headed to my Junior High School. I had this little black dog that would meet me every morning and walk about four blocks with me. I loved this little dog.
You see, I was walking to school as an awkward teen. Growing up in a middle-class white privileged community, my friends had someone to drive them to school. I actually got made fun of because I walked. And everyone saw me, it was on the busy street.
But this little dog brightened my walk. He would greet me with a huge smile and a wag of his tail every morning without fail. I don’t know where he came from but he was always there in the same spot at the corner of Braeswood and Braes Bayou Drive.
One morning everything changed. He met me in our usual spot. We walked a few steps and then for some reason he ran out into the busy street. A van hit him. He squealed and ran back towards me. I instinctively reached out to try and help him.
As I tried to help him he snapped at me and growled, much to my astonishment. He was definitely hurt. I looked up and the van was gone. I stood there and did not know what to do. The little dog lay down. I could not help him, he would bite me. I did not have enough life experience to know that when a dog is hurt, no matter how much it loves you, it will try to bite you as a defense mechanism.
I walked the rest of the way to school that morning with tears streaming down my face, trembling with sadness.
I immediately went to the office. We didn’t have cell phones in 1977, ya know. “I would call my mom.” I thought, “she’d know what to do.” I told her what happened but I do not think she understood me. My Nano was in town that day. She did not visit often and they had a big day planned.
That afternoon my mom and Nano picked me up from school. As we drove home I strained to see if that dog was there. I think I saw a little black body by the fire hydrant where he would meet me but I am not totally sure.
I like to think he went home and got fixed by his family. I also like to think he was so traumatized that he decided not to ever walk by Braeswood again because I never saw him again.
I learned that day somehow that I would be responsible for the consequences that happened in my life. I am quite sure it was a limiting belief. But that belief has served me on many occasions.
Someone could blame my mom for not being there for me to help me save that little dog. But I really think my mom did not understand what happened. We never talked about that traumatic incident - nor any traumatic incident for that matter.
Trauma was not in our dictionary at home. My parents have a deep love for each other. I can honestly say I never saw my parents fight. Not once. Because I never saw my parents fight, I had zero life skills when it comes to fighting. When I say zero, I mean zero!
I was left to my own consequences.
—Excerpt from my book The Truth Bubbles Up. Click the link for more information on the book.—-
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The reason I told that story
That story is in Chapter One of The Truth Bubbles Up. It is there intentionally and it serves as several lessons that are dispersed throughout the book.
Lesson #1: Hurt people, hurt people
Every single one of us is hurting in some form or fashion. Some hurts are worse than others. And when you try to help someone who is hurting they can oftentimes reach out to bite you like the little black dog.
There is a victim-victimizer cycle going on in all of us and the only way out is to live from a place of victor. I write about this cycle often but it is best expressed like this:
Have you ever watched an argument and wondered who is the bigger fool? There is a victim being victimized by another individual. And that cycle goes on and on until one concedes or they just get tired of the argument.
This cycle is identified in the story above when the dog became a victim. He tried to victimize me as a defense mechanism. And that cycle would have been never-ending due to my lack of life skills and understanding.
That cycle goes on in the world. And it is the worst going on inside of ourselves as well!
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Lesson #2: We are not victims of our circumstances. It is your choice.
Your choice is a powerful responsibility. It is your choice to look at this as a sad and poor victim mentality.
As I wrote this story I wondered what my mom would say. I felt bad for her. After she read the book she told me that she wished she had done things differently. While this made me feel a little better I realized something.
I needed a very thorough understanding that we are not victims of our circumstances. Once we take responsibility for what happens things look different.
That little black dog story is symbolic of my life. I have had many hurt people hurt me. I am sure you have too. But it is how we choose to look at it that matters.
See that little black dog as an angel teaching me the most valuable lesson of all. We are not victims of what happens to us. We can let go of the loss, we can trust that the process is there for a reason, we can accept responsibility for the circumstances and choose to see things with love, light, and joy.
But it is always a choice.
Because we can also choose: to hold on to resentment and anger, blame someone else, blame ourselves, and feel guilt and shame and wish we had done differently.
It is your choice. Is it a difficult choice? Yes, sometimes. But you still get to choose. Choose your hard.
And I choose to see things with faith and love. Like Philippians 4:8 teaches us: Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
The choice is yours. I can tell you without a shadow of a doubt that choosing love is by far the best way to live. No matter what.
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